We were sitting outside in a breezeway. The early morning sun had risen high above us when a few short hours ago it had been behind us. We were sweaty and hot but not miserable. We had gathered to do what we have been called to do, and in that calling I think it fair to say, we all find peace and encouragement. There are five of us that are co-laborers in that calling. We are all ages, different places in life, all having different careers, husbands and children, all different yet all the same in sharing the goal of  ministry. 

I am convinced that it is the Holy Spirit that binds us all together so well. The oldest of our team is a grandmother, they call her “Cheech.” She has a gaggle of granddaughters that we as a team have become quite fond of. We have declared, they too are our coworkers in Christ because one or more of them is with Cheech on any given day. 

As per usual Cheech was working away and the Baby Girl of our group at just barely a year old became slightly disgruntled with her position in the stroller. Our leader, The Writer, she is actually a writer where I just dream of being one. The Writer loves a baby and pounced on the opportunity to hold the fussy Baby Girl. The Writer had been sitting next to me, and our conversations had meandered like a cool stream on a hot day. We would pause and pick up, each conversation refreshing to the soul. We paused again, for her to pick up the fussy baby. She bounced Baby Girl and talked softly to her. The Writer and I exchanged stories of the babies in our lives, the very babies that are headed off to college or are already there. 

The Writer is tall and lean. She is beautiful and graceful. She has features that often remind me of an English Aristocrat from bygone days. Her dress is uniquely her own, her clothes are often long and flowing and just give credence to her appearance. She carries herself beautifully, sometimes she reminds me of someone walking among clouds. She is genuinely beautiful. However, if you ask her, she takes none of the credit and gives it all to Jesus. That is just how she is. He gets the credit for all of the good things that she is. 

As Baby Girl shifted back and forth, The Writer  laughingly said, “It’s all the sharp edges.” She is thin, and unlike me, her bones are not covered and softened by even an ounce of adipose. The truth is, I do not have a sharp edges anywhere unless I happen to have a pair of scissors in my pocket. I have often said babies are fond of me because I can give them a soft place to rest. Eventually Baby Girl found a satisfactory spot to lay her head and dozed off in the arms of The Writer, both were in a place of happiness and rest. The Writer sat back in her folding chair, baby in arms, and we continued where our conversation had left off. We talked of plans and of the Lord. We always talk about the Lord. If our conversation steers away from the Lord, she always brings it back to Him, she is just like that. 

The Writer appears sharp in places. If one judges on outward appearance alone, one would think she is not a soft place to land. And it is in that regard she reminds me of the Lord. 

It would not be so far-fetched to say to some, “He can appear harsh, distant, and uncomfortable.” He is by definition often with the appearance of  the sharp edges. But when you take the time to know Him, to talk with Him, to learn His character, you realize He is the best of places to land. He is full of grace and beauty, truth and authorship much like my friend, The Writer.

 

Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise. Ephesians 5:15

Our cute little black Grand-dog brings much humor to our lives. One of the funniest things to watch him do is chasing flies. Yes, you read it right. He hates flies, and chases them gnashing his teeth trying to catch them. If he does catch them, he actually eats them. Gross! I know.

One day as I was watching him, I began to wonder if Satan doesn’t sit back and laugh at us some days watching us snap at the flies he sends buzzing around us. You know what I mean? Flies like: a comment on Facebook that we just can’t let go and keep checking to see if the OP (original poster) has responded to our comment, a relationship based on jealousy that constantly buzzes around our heads as we say to ourselves, “She just did that to 1-up me,” or even the flies at church of little slights or offenses or feeling “Uninvited” as a recent book title proclaimed.

Satan knows how to bug us. Pun intended. He knows how to get us distracted with silly, meaningless situations that grab our whole focus and leave us unobservant of the things The Father would have us notice. Things like: the pain that Facebook poster is dealing with that makes her post harsh, critical things, the friend’s need for unconditional love that God wants us to give to them while letting Him (not others) fill us, or the loneliness and emptiness of those around us wanting to feel accepted and significant just like we long to be.

Let us not go around acting like silly dogs, ladies. It’s not near as cute when we do it as when my little dog does it – not cute at all. Satan knows how to bait us. He wants to get us so distracted with useless flies, that we miss the important things worthy of our focus and attention and energy, like nurturing and discipling our families, caring for the lonely and broken, and steeping our minds in His Word.

I know I’m not the only one who has ”read my Bible” with dozens of those flies buzzing around my mind and gone away totally unaware of having heard from the Father. Sometimes I can’t even tell you later in the day what I read about because my mind was so distracted.

And I’d bet I’m not the only one who has gotten a case of the mulligrubs, feeling so sorry for myself that I don’t have the mental energy to reach out and take a meal to a hurting person, or call someone who is down, or even bother to speak kindly to the people in my household. I become so self-focused because of those flies that I am not living out even the basic commands of the Word of God. I waste my energy on a useless chasing after things that don’t matter.

It’s time we focus on God’s purpose for our day. Let’s give up the petty distractions of the enemy for a rich life of obedience to God that will yield joy in our souls and something much more worthy of our time and effort than those silly flies.

Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. Resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same kinds of suffering are being experienced by your brotherhood throughout the world. 1 Peter 5:8-9

Open in a time of prayer, turning your heart to your Father.

I will lift up my eyes to the mountains;
From where shall my help come?

Lift your eyes to heaven.

My help comes from the Lord,
Who made heaven and earth.

You’re Helper is your Creator. Tell Him the areas you need help.

He will not allow your foot to slip;
He who keeps you will not slumber.

He won’t bail on you, but will be there to help you in all your struggles.

Behold, He who keeps Israel
Will neither slumber nor sleep.

The Lord is your keeper;
The Lord is your shade on your right hand.

He offers shade and rest when you are weary and battle-worn.

The sun will not smite you by day,
Nor the moon by night.

He offers round the clock protection from all the forces of nature that come against you.

The Lord will protect you from all evil;
He will keep your soul.
The Lord will guard your going out and your coming in
From this time forth and forever.

He offers protection from evil and guards us forever!

Praise His name and worship Him today!

I recently read One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp. It truly opened my heart to the great value of gratefulness and the disservice we do to ourselves and those around us when we move through the world operating with ungrateful hearts. Worry builds, self-focus controls our thoughts, and we lose sight of the wonderful things God does for us when we take things for granted.

We are reminded over and over in scripture to be thankful. Do we heed those instructions, or do we selfishly walk through life feeling like things are owed to us rather than being grateful for all we have?

They sang, praising and giving thanks to the Lord, saying, “For He is good, for His lovingkindness is upon Israel forever.” Ezra 3:11  

Do we thank God simply because He is good to us? Or do we take it for granted?

The Lord is my strength and my shield; My heart trusts in Him, and I am helped; Therefore my heart exults, And with my song I shall thank Him. Psalm 28:7

Do we thank Him when He helps us and strengthens us? Or do we take it for granted?

I will give You thanks in the great congregation; I will praise You among a mighty throng. Psalm 35:18

Do we join together in worship and thank Him corporately? Or does that seem unimportant to us in this modern age?

I will give thanks to You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Wonderful are Your works, And my soul knows it very well. Psalm 139:14

Do we thank Him for making us the way we are, and who we are, and where we are and when we were born? Or do we ungratefully complain about parts of how He made us?

So they removed the stone. Then Jesus raised His eyes, and said, “Father, I thank You that You have heard Me. John11:41

Do we thank Him for answered prayer, or do we chalk it up to “good luck” when something happens that we prayed about? 

And He directed the people to sit down on the ground; and taking the seven loaves, He gave thanks and broke them, and started giving them to His disciples to serve to them, and they served them to the people. Mark 8:6

Do we even bother to be grateful for our food and take a moment to thank Him before we eat? Or do we ungratefully rush on through with our meal without a thankful thought at all?

But thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. 1 Corinthians 15:57

Do we thank Him and give Him credit for all our victories?

Thanks be to God for His indescribable gift! 2 Corinthians 9:15

Do we at least thank God for His best gift of all – giving His son Jesus to die for our sins?

In everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. 1 Thessalonians 5:18

Everything? Really?! The hard? The sad? The mean things people have done to us? In everything God calls us to a spirit of gratefulness. Why? Because it is good for our hearts. To be grateful, you must acknowledge the Someone to whom you are grateful. Gratefulness keeps us humbled before God and focused on Him in all things. This thankful attitude is the solution to fear, selfishness, worry, and most every negative emotion we embrace, because an appropriate view of God from a thankful heart keeps us ever aware of His place of omnipotence as creator, provider, and ruler over us. It has been said that Gratefulness is to worry as antibiotics are to an infection. So today as you battle negative emotions and situations, bow a head and offer a prayer of thankfulness to find a proper perspective for life and healing for your heart.

When my four, now adult offspring were babies and young children, I struggled. Loving, kissing booboos, doing laundry, feeding, cuddling, entertaining, picking up the mess, resolving quarrels, teaching them – these constant needs, demands, and responsibilities left me depleted. Frankly, my husband got worn out with my complaining and weariness and lack of energy for him. I wanted to enjoy my family, but I never seemed to find a chance to recharge my self.

After a long day of work, while Randy was sitting listening to my normal litany of failure and disappointment with life, he offered some unsolicited advice – which we all know is never appreciated in the moment. He said, “Deb, I think if you’d get down in the floor and play with them for 30 minutes or so first thing in the morning, they’d go play on their own and leave you alone for a bit.” I don’t remember my response (I’m probably blocking it out because it wasn’t pretty), but at a minimum I’m sure I huffed off thinking he was insensitive and just didn’t understand.

As often happens, God worked on me with Randy’s words after the fact. As I mulled them over in my thoughts, his idea sounded more and more plausible. Our family always talked about filling up our “love tanks,” wasn’t this just another way to do that? We even had a little hand signal that meant “hug alert.” (In other words, I’m feeling down and need a hug!) I knew my main job as mom was to love and nurture my kids and raise them to love God and others. But why did it seem like all the duties of the home trumped my willingness to just sit and play and love on them and fill up their little love tanks?

I vividly remember that morning – we played with the 4-year-old’s Barney’s Tree House, moving the characters around and singing their songs. She was happy. The 10-year-old sat building amazing things with his legos and explaining all the intricacies of them to me. He felt I was interested in him. The baby lay gurgling on his blanket beside us slinging and chewing on toys and trying to “talk” to us, while the 7-year-old played mama to him and ended up bringing nearly every baby toy we owned to him. Those 2 were content. It was a joyous morning.

It was actually less than an hour before the eldest took to his room to complete his lego fantasy and the two girls headed to play with the Barbie house, Barney being long forgotten. I fed the baby and put him down for a nap. As I sat back down I realized the house was quietly running with just the babble of happy children in the background. I put on blinders to the housework that needed to be done and spent almost the baby’s entire nap contently reading. Lesson learned. My husband did know something about mothering!

Not every morning afterwards went perfectly smoothly like that one, but a new way of thinking and behaving was born out of that experience. What were my take-aways?

1. Listen to the wisdom of my husband.
2. Children are a treasure from the Lord – even when it doesn’t feel like it.
3. Savor the moments / engage with my children. That moment – that day – will never be available to me for a redo.
4. There is grace and a fresh start and hope for every thing I felt I have failed on.
5. Don’t feel any mama-guilt over taking some healthy downtime.
6. Spend time with the Lord.
7. And last but not least – I am not always right, contrary to what I like to believe. I still have lots to learn.

Sweet mommies out there, give yourself grace. Kids learn even from, or maybe especially from, our mistakes. Take time to sit and love on and play with the little ones even when the house is a wreck. Take time for yourself – Bible reading, listening to good music, enjoying a workout, sitting on the back porch with lemonade – when your tank is full and your spirit and body are nourished you are more energized to pour into your kids and to nourish your family. Treasure your children and husband. And for heaven’s sake listen to that man God gave you, he may have the winning idea after all!

Encouragement for Parents

By guest author Kimberly Henderson

He sat on the bench, unwilling to participate in his first soccer game. The four-year-old looked cute in his new uniform, but there was nothing cute about his stubbornness. Despite pleas from his mom and dad, and yes there was an attempt at bribery, that four-year old was not going to play soccer. The ride home was quiet, and no reasons were given for this stubbornness and disobedience. Later in the afternoon, my son quietly and timidly revealed the reason for his hesitancy to play soccer – there were people on the field that he did not know! Ok. No, wait. What?? In all the practices and drills and game day preparations, he somehow missed a key component of competition – there are two teams required for a game. Shocked at how he could not know this and even more appalled at why that was a problem at all, that day I learned a lot about expectations. My son had expected one thing – to play with his teammates. However, reality did not meet his expectations when the other team took the field, and to him the only option was to sit on the sideline.

Fast forward a decade to the spring of 2020, and I find myself and my family, along with the rest of the world, with expectations that are not being met. Expectations not met in a person’s life can manifest in disappointment, disengagement or even depression. Overnight, the enemy, who seeks to kill, steal and destroy, turned the world upside down. For our students expectations began to crumble: lost sport seasons, missed graduation ceremonies, and canceled recitals, classes and trips. As a parent my expectations cascaded down as well, from the simple – why is there no toilet paper in the store – to the complicated – how are we going to manage school and work simultaneously from inside these four walls? Even church services, a weekly source of encouragement and community, were limited. At times, I felt like I was watching life from the sidelines. 

As we navigate these situations and emotions brought about by a worldwide pandemic, it is important for us as parents to engage our students in conversation and in the Word. Ask your student about how they feel amid the changes and uncertainty. Remind them that their feelings do not define them or determine truth – the word of God does. Point them to Jesus, the One who is for them (Romans 8:31), the One who never changes (Hebrews 13:8), the One who began a good work in them and will complete it (Philippians 1:6). Two practical ways to point your students to Jesus is through studying the Bible together and practicing thankfulness.

As you disciple your student, remember the importance of spending time together reading the Bible. What seems like a simple step, if woven throughout the course of our days and weeks, will gird our students with truth and equip them for all things the Lord has planned for them. 

As we read the stories of God’s faithfulness throughout the Old Testament and traverse the New Testament and marvel at Jesus’ sacrifice on our behalf, our students will have a foundation for making wise decisions and find their identity and security as a follower of Christ, not the fleeting pleasures and hollow promises of the world that can be gone overnight. 

Another practical way to point your student to Jesus is to practice thankfulness as a family. All of our families have been impacted by the coronavirus in some way – from minor inconveniences for some to major, heart-breaking losses for others. Wherever you are, know that the Lord sees you, and is near. He will comfort and bring peace. 

Even in our darkest nights we can give thanks to the One who is with us in the trials and storms and disappointments. 

Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances, for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

As we give thanks as a family for even small things it helps parents and students alike to remember God’s faithfulness and His promise to always be with us. 

Despite the enemy’s attempts to sideline us all from living the life we are called to in Christ, the gospel will not be bound (2 Timothy 2:9), and His Word will accomplish what He sends it forth to do (Isaiah 55:11). Engage your students in conversation. Encourage them with the Word of God. Jesus knows what to expect in this life. He warned his disciples what was to come, yet comforted them with a promise of peace. Today we are also warned and comforted by His words.

“I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.” John 16:33