The tree. Unwrapping gifts. Cooking. Santa. Family. Travel. Stockings. Services at church.
Amid all the excitement, sights and noises, and the pressure of the Christmas “To Do” list, take time today to meditate on the True Gift of Christmas – Jesus our Savior who came as a baby to a poor family to bring hope and salvation to your family.
Merry Christmas!
“What do ya think? Should we be Mary and baby Jesus in the live nativity?”
It was slightly a disconnected question, neither of us had been talking about the baby Jesus, a live nativity, or her child.
She was a young mama with two small children, a newborn and a toddler. I smiled and answered,
“How sweet. You would make a cute Mary and that sweet newborn baby would be a darling Baby Jesus.”
She corrected me, she wasn’t talking about her newborn, she meant her toddler. “They have all the newborn Jesuses they need, they need a slightly older Jesus for when the wise men come.” I understood better what she meant. When the magi came to present their gifts to Jesus he would have been a bit older, Mary the mother of a toddler.
I giggled when she clarified. “Oh, your little fella will be so perfect!
Then she said out loud what must have been her reason for hesitation when answering the call for participants.
“Yeah but I don’t want anyone to see Baby Jesus throw a temper tantrum.”
I envision Jesus having a toddler tantrum in all the moments of His earthly life and ministry when it would have been completely warranted, reasonable, and understandable. Moments when disappointment would have prevailed, sorrow pervasive, and despair prevalent. In all those moments He maintained self-control and never sinned. I pondered on that further.
“For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin.” Hebrews 4:15
In every respect He was tempted and yet remained sinless, He didn’t throw a toddler tantrum and neither should I.
I asked my friend if she knew what other details would pertain to the live nativity gig, and she she told me that the toddler Jesuses would take shifts and that the The Wise Men will bring some gifts and open them up presenting them to the Jesus stand-ins. “But it’s not gold frankincense or myrrh… I’ve actually heard it’s Cheetos,” and I began to laugh, deep belly laughs that the word says are good like a medicine. I laughed until I wheezed at the irony of the gifts and the presentation of a snack food to pacify grumpy toddlers, and for the appreciation of my King and what a good gift-giver, Savior, and friend that He is.
Being in two places at one time has always seemed an impossibility, and then I began to understand through the help of dramatic cinema, one can be in two places at one time. Say for instance standing in one state with one leg and another with the other. I realized it wasn’t an impossibility necessarily, just my perspective made it one.
Several weeks ago, maybe months now I realized my heart had been in two places at one time.
“I’m holding gratitude in one hand and brokenness in the other.” It was a text to me from my sister. I was in an ICU room, She was taxiing on the tarmac.
I read it and had to for the umpteenth time choked back the tears. The overwhelming flood of emotion that binds itself to fear, frustration, anxiety, exhaustion and relief. In my head as I read it I changed the pronoun “I” to “we” then nodded in silent agreement.
I’ve never in my four decades of life felt more broken, felt more external brokenness. When quizzed I usually just gloss over and say “It’s just a lot.” There have been a lot of things really over the course of this 2023 but that day came barging its way in trying to top all the things, all the places of brokenness.
I was shook. Gutted. Heart wrenched. Wrecked.
I found myself in a place of such brokenness I wondered at times if I could survive it. I had experienced some hard things before but this wasn’t a thing, this was numerous things, seemingly impossible and insurmountable things yet I was also at the same time so filled with gratitude. I was so grateful because I knew I wasn’t alone, I knew God was in control. Grateful for prayers and petitions and intercessions. I found myself in two places at one time, holding brokenness in one hand and gratitude in the other. I began to and have since been pondering if it is possible to be broken and grateful at the same time? I have realized fully yes, yes you can.
When Jesus stood before the tomb of his friend Lazarus he was broken. Broken over sin and death, the pain and sorrow of His Bethany friends, broken to the point of tears. “Jesus Wept.” (John 11:35) After he had words with Martha, commanded the stone to be rolled from the entrance of the tomb Jesus expressed gratitude in John 11:41. ““Father, I thank you that you have heard me.” Jesus held brokenness in one hand and gratitude in the other. His example demonstrates we can find ourselves in places of hurt, sorrow, pain, brokenness but we can trust the God who loves us to use our gratitude for our good and His glory.
In my line of work one must cause pain to bring about healing. It’s a fact that Intravenous (into the vein) medications can only be introduced into the vein one way, through a small catheter introduced with a needle. That introduction hurts.
In over two decades of working IV access has been called many things, a stick, a poke, an ouchie, an owie, the devil’s fingernail, all number of negative things. An IV placement is never a fun experience and it can be challenging at times. It is painful but necessary for healing.
So the day I walked through the hallway saying, “I’ve stuck that baby twice already today” and it wasn’t even noon it was no surprise my coworker looked up from his computer puzzled. He knew what I know, multiple sticks in a short time frame is a bit of an oddity. He was puzzled and his expression told me so. He leaned forward like he was ready to help me remedy the situation. I noticed his confusion and quickly clarified.
“Not the baby, her baby.” He was still confused. “Her baby doll, I’ve had to pretend stick that baby twice today.” He leaned back in his chair, the confusion dissipating from his face.
I’ve had to pretend stick lots of babies, teddy bears, Lego dudes, cartoon characters galore. If it is an accompaniment to my patient made of plush, plastic or rubbery covering and can be held together with adhesive I’ve been known to pretend place an IV before placing a real IV in my patient.
Time and experience have taught me having a friend with a similar ailment, in this case an IV, is oftentimes helpful for my little friends. That particular day the plastic patient was just shy of six inches tall making the maintenance of its pretend IV placement a tad difficult; in addition the pretend patient’s caregiver kept carrying her around by said IV. The tape kept giving away. Hence my second stick prior to noon. Before the day was over I would have pretend placed that IV no less than six times.
I’ll be honest I’ve practiced pretend IV placement for a number of years and known it’s helpful for my patients but I’ve never thought about why it’s so helpful until after that sixth stick that day.
As humans we tolerate suffering better when we are not alone. The word is clear in numerous places that we are never alone or forsaken if we know God. We will endure trials and suffering but we are promised we will not do it alone. The enemy works through isolation, God works through community. When we find ourselves in times of suffering we can trust that God is near, close in fact to the broken-hearted, and that He cares for us. Like a friend with a pretend IV, just knowing we aren’t alone is so very comforting and ushers in healing on the heels the sorrow and pain.
Blessed are you who are poor, for yours is the kingdom of God. Blessed are you who hunger now, for you shall be satisfied. Blessed are you who weep now, for you shall laugh. Blessed are you when men hate you, and ostracize you, and insult you, and scorn your name as evil, for the sake of the Son of Man. Be glad in that day and leap for joy, for behold, your reward is great in heaven. Luke 6:20-23
When I was a child there was a wonderful hymn we sang in church titled “Count Your Blessings.” You may remember it; we don’t sing it much anymore because its words are a bit antiquated, but the premise of the song is an important one. When we are discouraged, when we are weighed down with the cares of this life, when we see others flourishing while we are barely getting by, or when we are embroiled in conflict, we do not need to let these thoughts consume us, depress us, or make us doubt God’s love for us.
What do we need to do? The song title says it all. We need to count our blessings.
A favorite author of mine, Anne Voskamp wrote a wonderful little book, One Thousand Gifts. It documents a year long effort she made to keep a journal of things for which she was grateful. Finding things to be grateful for in every situation of life, can be a challenge for me. I think that is why I loved her book and also why I love the song “Count Your Blessings.” They both remind me to look for the good, the blessing, the unexpected moments of joy in even the worst of times.
So, this Thanksgiving if you are struggling to find God’s goodness and grace to you in the trials of life, drag out a journal or a piece of paper and start a list. I’ll give you three things to start your list:
Now it’s your turn. Go for it! Add to your list. Intentionally think through and seek out things worth giving thanks for no matter how small they are. Good things come in small packages you know!
Listen to the hymn. Mull over its words. Count your blessings and be blessed!
When upon life’s billows you are tempest tossed,
When you are discouraged, thinking all is lost,
Count your many blessings, name them one by one,
And it will surprise you what the Lord hath done.
Count your blessings, name them one by one;
Count your blessings, see what God hath done;
Count your blessings, name them one by one;
Count your many blessings, see what God hath done.
Are you ever burdened with a load of care?
Does the cross seem heavy you are called to bear?
Count your many blessings, ev’ry doubt will fly,
And you will be singing as the days go by. [Refrain]
When you look at others with their lands and gold,
Think that Christ has promised you His wealth untold;
Count your many blessings, money cannot buy
Your reward in heaven, nor your home on high. [Refrain]
So, amid the conflict, whether great or small,
Do not be discouraged, God is over all;
Count your many blessings, angels will attend,
Help and comfort give you to your journey’s end. [Refrain]
Baptist Hymnal, 1991
James 5:16 “Therefore confess your sins to one another AND pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working.”
That’s the ESV version. The AMV (Amy Martin version) goes something like this:
“Pray for each other for all kinds of things, but especially for healing, the prayers of God’s people get stuff done!”
In the wee hours of the morning a few weeks ago I sat in the hospital next to my mama. I found myself somewhere between midnight vital signs and dark-thirty. There was her rhythmic soft snoring in my right ear and a Jane Austen documentary playing from my phone in my left, I thought about that verse.
I looked over to my right and mama was lying on her side sleeping and I thought what a gift of grace and mercy I had been given. Immediately my thoughts turned to all the prayers of the people and how powerful and effective they were, how what seemed like an impossibility just a few hours before was now the reality.
My mama had a stroke, what could have been a bad one. Had things been different words like catastrophic and detrimental, would be the only ones to describe what happened rather than healed, good, expected full recovery.
I thought about time and a domino effect that led to that moment in time and the providence of what happened, and I told my Lord I was sorry. I confessed my sin, not so mama could be healed, but because she had been despite my confession. I call it backwards thinking, I think backwards leading up to an event to determine if I can sort out what happened. It is a strange practice but I must admit I learned it from one of my favorite writers. This writer would take the reader backwards in time discovering the facts and actions surrounding circumstances until the logical conclusion could be reached. Oftentimes it is a series of seemingly small or unrelated circumstances, possibilities of chance, choices and actions that have an impact on the world and way the reader is living today.
The entertainment business has also taken up the practice. There are shows that recreate the moments leading up to a disaster in order to figure out what and where things went wrong to produce such catastrophic outcomes. My backwards thinking moments do not always come with such dramatic and intense results like say, a bridge collapse, but in this circumstance, in that moment, it was life over death.
Several Sunday nights before, 4 weeks to the day actually, I sat in an emergency vet holding our little dapple doxie as she died.
I was wrecked.
Life has been especially grueling and one of my sweetest, most comforting, and constant companions was that little doggie. She hardly was out of my presence and when I so desperately needed a tangible reminder, encouragement, and ever-present friend that little wiener-dog was it.
Even if I hadn’t said out loud but a few times, I’d said to God in my heart at least a dozen if not more,
“Really God? Really? I mean life is crummy right now but did ya have to take my dog too?!”
That question was always met by silence, and a bitterness about it all was growing inside of me. Isolation, silence, anger and resentment are like growth hormones for bitterness.
I kept trying to remind myself of what I know, God’s ways aren’t my ways, He is good and He can be trusted but I just kept meeting that with “But what good could come from taking my one doggie friend?”
I now know.
A good that He couldn’t have explained to me in full but I reckon He knew I’d figure out in the wee hours of the morning, while sitting in a yellowish hospital chair, next to mama with a Jane Austen documentary playing in the background.
A couple of weeks after Macy died Charlotte and Shelton adopted a pup from the pound (I don’t even think that’s what it’s called anymore, but I digress.) A pup that is named Dot and belongs to Charlotte. Had Macy not died there would be no Dottie Joe Martin in my house.
Dottie is kinda dumb. But I’ve discovered she’s also kind of smart. She’s a bonafide mutt of some sort and a puppy, for sure. I had been trying to teach Dottie some basic things necessary to survive her puppyhood under my roof.
The Sunday before had started out rough, so as divine providence would have it I was home, walking that dumb Dottie when my mama called me. Any other Sunday afternoon I wouldn’t have been home. Any other Sunday afternoon I would have been miles and more than just minutes away.
Any other Sunday I couldn’t have done what was done to save mama’s life. Any other Sunday I wouldn’t have had Dumb Dottie training in progress when life took a drastic turn.
It wasn’t until that moment in the hospital when I knew and understood what I had no way of knowing or understanding before. As I sat next to mama (who has mostly regained everything lost, who is expected to make a full recovery but just needs a little time to get there, who received a life-saving, “time-critical” medication, exactly within the window of needing it) I knew and understand why my dog and sweet friend had to leave my side at the exact moment she did. And for the first time in my life I recognized and understood God’s sovereignty in a real and tangible way.
My eyes began to water and I confessed my sin not so that, but because my mama was healed.
Mama is home and besides some medication management and minimal changes she has done remarkably well. I will admit she can’t cough without my mind going to dark places. In time, I am trusting as mama heals, my heart will too. And I recognize that it was my backwards thinking and God’s higher thoughts that yielded that outcome.
by Kim Hamm
Can you believe that Thanksgiving and Christmas will soon be here? That means we will be adding even more chaos to our very busy schedules! Remember to stop and count your blessings when you begin to feel overwhelmed. The moments of chaos with your family can make a lifetime of memories.
This time of the year can get overwhelming with all the activities and commitments we add to our schedules. Instead of feeling stressed out, take a few minutes to reflect on God’s goodness in your life. He knows what you need and what your family needs. Don’t be discouraged if you don’t get that to-do list finished today. Even if you get everything on your list accomplished, there will be a new set of challenges tomorrow!
When you spend time alone with your our Heavenly Father it helps keep your perspective and our priorities straight. I pray that as we enter into the busy holiday season we will remain focused on Jesus Christ our Savior. Treasure all of the memories that will be made with your families!
May we take the time to be thankful for all the blessings that the Lord has given to each of us as we gather with our families for Thanksgiving. May our Christmas celebrations keep Jesus as our main focus! The baby born in the manger is still changing lives today. Only He can set the captive free! He is the Light that can shine through us to reach this lost dark world.
“Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set you free from the law of sin and death. For what the law was powerless to do because it was weakened by the flesh, God did by sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh to be a sin offering. And so he condemned sin in the flesh, in order that the righteous requirement of the law might be fully met in us, who do not live according to the flesh but according to the Spirit.” Romans 8:1-4
Seek Jesus. Find joy!
I love storms! The roll of the thunder, the lightening as it dances across the sky, the rain pouring off the edges of the roof. I just love it all. There is something cleansing to me about a good thunderstorm. Cloudy days are some of my favorite too. Oh, don’t get me wrong, I love the sunshine, but sometimes those cloudy days just have a way of soothing your aching soul. But, clouds over my life, that’s another story.
I like things to flow smoothly. I find comfort in the known. I like knowing what to expect. But, without fail, life happens and we all find ourselves feeling like a cloud is looming overhead. No matter how hard we try to move past it, that cloud just lingers sometimes. Everything breaks, the money runs out, the kids are a wreck, the house is a disaster, you burn everything you cook, you can’t get anything right at work, you’re on edge and your temper is at an all time high. It is then that you realize your forecast is cloudy with a chance of storms.
I had a week of storms recently. Some days it was just cloudy, other days the thunderstorms rolled, and a few days I do believe a hurricane blew through. I was flipping through my Bible randomly and landed in Exodus. I began to read about the journey through the desert and my eyes landed on Exodus 13:21 “God went ahead of them in a Pillar of Cloud during the day to guide them on the way…” (MSG).
A cloud covered them, shielded them, protected them, guided them… Interesting, isn’t it? To think that on the days where the clouds are so thick that you just don’t think you can make it, God may be protecting you. Or, what if that decision you make solely because of the cloud is God directing your path in that moment? Scenario after scenario I can envision God using something as simple as a cloud. It’s funny how different you view things the older you get. Things that used to be a nuisance are more of a moment to take a breath. And for me, now, cloudy days just won’t ever be the same. I’m not saying I won’t get weary or dream for the sunshine, but if it takes those cloudy days for me to stay on the right path or to be shielded from the enemy…I’ll take a forecast of cloudy with 100% chance of Jesus!
“You have searched me, Lord, and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue you, Lord, know it completely.” Psalm 139:1-4
The day was just turning dusk, the sun was lowering itself in the horizon and the long shadows that mark the coming of the sunset were gone. Supper was nearly finished at the camp and inside the dining hall camper hearts and bellies were full, fun music was thumping, laughter abounded, and everyone was dressed and ready for the upcoming dance that marked the end of the camp session.
I was running an errand back to the health hut as it’s known and had jumped on a golf cart. I turned to the right just as I was passing the kitchen of the dining hall and to my surprise there was an open window, standing just inside it was a lady. We made eye contact and I waved. The darkness of the day allowed me to see perfectly into the well lit kitchen. The darkness around me made it more difficult for her to see me.
The kitchen staff of the camp are the unsung heroes of a camp session. They feed an army of children ranging in ages from 6-18, they cook and prepare the food to fuel those bodies fresh from archery, swimming, boating, crafting, bounce house bouncing, all manner of activities.
That kitchen staff also feeds the camp staff that cares for the small army of campers, three full meals a day. As soon as one meal ends prep for the next one begins. They do a tremendous amount of work but they are rarely seen. They will serve the food, and do not hesitate to ask if there is something more that is needed, they never turn down the requested second helping from littles ones thrusting their plates toward the servers. The kitchen staff must recognize the ravenous state brought on by camp activities and days spent in the early summer sun, they pile plates high, they stretch the limits of even the sturdiest of paper plates.
There in that moment of clarity I was able to see what I typically couldn’t.
Darkness framed light and the light made the kitchen lady visible. As I waved to her I said to myself, “I see you.” I drove on, turned right at the pool and headed toward my destination and in that moment I heard the Lord say to me, “And I see you.”
Truth is, in the days of late I haven’t felt very seen.
There are times in our lives when we are the proverbial camp kitchen staff workers, when we are doing things, or going through things and it feels we are all alone or that no one notices, knows, or even cares.
Those are discouraging times, times when we don’t feel seen. When not being seen leads to thoughts of not being known, that leads to thoughts of not being cared for or loved.
To be seen is the first step of reassurance we all so often need, just feeling seen feeds the soul. God is not blind to our troubles, our unrewarded work or difficulties. He doesn’t turn away from us, in fact He has said in His word that He sees, He knows and He hears.
We live in this tension between eternity and the brevity of this temporal life. Between what is and what will be. Between living for God in a way that impacts future generations while at the same time realizing that time is short and this could be the last generation God allows to inhabit this earth. We live in this cocoon between physical birth and physical death, yet those of us who are Believers are eternal beings. Oh, the complexity of the life with Christ!
We exist in this world as “new creatures” while at the same time we feel the tug of the “old creature” pulling back like a shadow permanently attached to us, yet with a weight that tries to drag us back to the past, back to who we once were. We sense the freedom of our new justified state (forgiven and made right) in our relationship with Father God while we are still in the process of being sanctified (made holy) day by day. The dichotomy is almost too much for this human mind to grasp.
We live our daily lives in the balance too. We waiver between holiness and sinfulness on any given day. We waffle between glorifying God and self-glorification from one moment to the next. We make wise choices and selfish, evil choices within minutes of each other every single day. As the apostle Paul said, “For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing.” Romans 7:18-19
I am so glad that God is infinite, because my finite mind cannot comprehend all of these opposites that go hand-in-hand in the Christian life. So for today I will fully live in the in-between: the world of spirit and flesh, temporal and eternal, for the present and future, life and death, new creature and old, holy and sinful, godly and selfish, wise and foolish.
God is in the in-between. Worship and praise is in the in-between. Growth is in the in-between. Seeking holiness is in the in-between. A pathway to purity and righteousness is in the in-between. A valley is in the in-between, and God makes a way in the in-between and leads us through the valley of desperation to the place where we will live with Him forever.
Priceless 